


A Sip of Sake

by sssrha



Series: I’m just archiving this, don’t read it [1]
Category: Naruto
Genre: (see: Sakura is a terrifying drunk), Angst, Crack, Dai-nana-han | Team 7 (Naruto)-centric, Gen, Hatake Kakashi is an Irresponsible Idiot, Hospitalization, Sakura is a terrifying drunk, Strong Haruno Sakura, They’re all drunk except the one person who’s allowed to be drunk, Underage Drinking, and a single scene featuring next gen, naruto is an introspective drunk, please don’t actually read this, sasuke is a wimpy drunk, with a bit of - Freeform, yeah sure give super-powered teens alcohol I’m sure nothing could go wrong
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-03
Updated: 2018-07-03
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:01:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,826
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27787921
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sssrha/pseuds/sssrha
Summary: Kakashi got his twelve-year-old Genins drunk. Sasuke forgot about his revenge, Sakura was terrifying on a level Kakashi refused to touch, and Naruto...was silent.[Spanish Translation]
Relationships: Haruno Sakura & Hatake Kakashi & Uchiha Sasuke & Uzumaki Naruto
Series: I’m just archiving this, don’t read it [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2033011
Comments: 3
Kudos: 64





	A Sip of Sake

**Author's Note:**

> Holy fucking shitttt dont actually read this. I wrote it so long ago and I just wanted to archive this somewhere other than ffn/Wattpad so I shoved it here so I can sleep soundly.
> 
> If you are gonna read it please know that my writing style has changed significantly since I wrote this. Please.

It was a completely normal day. Team 7 had a D-rank outside the Village walls. It was done and they were trudging their way back home under the blinding sun.

Kakashi smiled cheerfully. "There's some shade over there! Why don't we take a break?"

Not even a second later, Naruto was hugging him, babbling about how he was the best sensei ever! Sakura thanked him, her face red from the heat, and even Sasuke looked relieved.

They sat in the shade and talked (or rolled their eyes, in Sasuke's case) until Kakashi said, "Let's have a drink!"

He handed out cups and poured some water into each. When they took a sip, though, it became very clear that it was not water.

Kakashi smirked under his mask.

Naruto proceeded to choke, spray Kakashi in the face with sake, and let out many cuss words that just made Kakashi chuckle. Sakura just spit the alcoholic drink out of her mouth, a scowl on her face. Sasuke was the only one to swallow, though with a great deal of effort.

He then turned to Kakashi. "What was that?"

"A drink," Kakashi said blandly.

"It's alcohol. We're twelve."

Naruto had moved on to words that weren't cuss words, but the way he said them sure made them sound dirty.

"Yeah," Sakura agreed, finally getting her bearings after that surprise, "it's bad for our immune system."

"Nonsense!" Kakashi said.

"Nonsense?! We could get liver disease!"

"Only with excessive drinking," Kakashi said flippantly. "Besides, my sensei, the Fourth Hokage, did it to our team. His sensei, Jiraiya the Sannin, did it to his, and his sensei, the Third Hokage, did it to his, and his sensei, the Second Hokage-"

"Did it to his?" Sasuke finished dryly.

"Yep! It's Team 7 tradition! Your first drink is with your teammates!"

"While that is very sweet and poetic," Sakura said, "we are, once again, twelve!"

"And again, this is a one-time thing! I'll make sure that you don't drink again until you're at the legal limit!" All bets are off after that, though.

Sakura's eye twitched. "...fine."

Sasuke glanced at her. She was a fangirl and very annoying, but Sasuke had to admit her strengths. She had always scored more than him on the written tests, even he had scored the best overall.

Sasuke had known drinking at their age was bad, but he didn't really know any of the specifics. From Sakura's scandalized look, she probably did.

This was just a one-time thing. If Sakura, who seemed to know the most about this subject (bar Kakashi), agreed...

Sasuke hesitantly nodded.

All eyes turned to Naruto.

Naruto's eye twitched.

"Oh hell no! I don't really even care of it's bad for me, it tastes horrible! I refuse to drink another drop!"

"But Naruto," Kakashi said, "the Yondaime, Sandaime, and Nidaime all did it with their teams!"

Naruto, who apparently hadn't heard the previous conversation, paused. "R-Really?"

Kakashi nodded and handed Naruto a cup refilled with sake. "They did."

Naruto was still a little apprehensive. Finally, he sat up straight, shut his eyes closed, and downed the cup in one go.

He ended up coughing and cussing, but he did swallow it. Sasuke and Sakura followed in suit.

"Hey," Sasuke said, already feeling the effects, "why aren't you drinking anything, Kachi-sensei?" He frowned slightly when he couldn't properly pronounce his sensei's name.

"I'm the one who has to keep you out of trouble," Kakashi explained.

"Oh," Sasuke mumbled, swallowing more sake.

Sakura slammed her cup on the ground. "Either we're done here or you give me more!" she hissed.

Kakashi sweat-dropped, pouring her some more.

Guess the two of them are down for the count...

Sasuke, who had snagged a whole bottle, started rambling incoherently about revenge. Sakura suddenly crawled over and punched Sasuke in the face, sending him sprawling to the ground.

"Shut up before I kill you," Sakura said, getting a kunai out of her pouch. Kakashi snatched it away from her.

Sasuke was cowering on the ground and Sakura mumbled absentmindedly, wondering where her kunai went.

"Uh...what's wrong with them?" Naruto asked.

Kakashi blinked. Naruto downed another cup, probably his eighth by now, and showing no signs of being drunk.

Must be the Kyuubi healing him.

"They're drunk, Naruto."

"Why am I not drunk?"

"Your...little friend gives you accelerated healing."

"Oh..."

Everything went downhill from there. That was to be expected, though. From the hazy memories of his first drink, he had ended up having a staring contest with a log, Rin had threatened to castrate him, and Obito had somehow put a literal leash on their sensei, claiming him as his new pet human.

Sasuke started his monologue on revenge again, only to pause, frowning. "Wha' wa' I talkin' 'bout?"

"How you're going to get revenge," Kakashi said helpfully.

"Reven'? On who?"

"Your brother."

"...I ha' a bwotha?"

"Yes, and he killed your entire family."

"...who ah they again?"

Oh boy.

"Never mind."

"'Kay, Kachi-se-"

"The sound of you breathing is so annoying." Sasuke froze. Sakura, who had said that, sneered at him. Her grip on her cup was so tight that it shattered. She didn't seem to feel the pain from the gashes due to the porcelain shards.

She slowly stalked over to him. Sasuke's eyes widened in fear. "Sh-Shtop! Kachi-sensei, hewp!"

Kakashi, however, was preoccupied with something else. It had been an hour and Naruto was drunk, as shown by the red flush on his cheeks. However, following the obvious trend, Naruto was the complete opposite of his normal self.

Naruto lazily took a swig from the bottle of sake he had stolen from Sasuke. He watched Sakura try to kill Sasuke with disinterested, far-away eyes.

Kakashi walked over and sat next to Naruto.

"What's on your mind?"

Naruto shrugged half-heartedly. "Nothing."

Kakashi sighed. "I would normally call you out for saying something like that but I, having been drunk many times, know that it's quite possible to think about nothing for extended periods of time."

Naruto snorted, taking another gulp. "...shouldn't you be more concerned that Sakura's trying to kill Sasuke?"

"Shouldn't you?"

"They're your students."

"They're your teammates."

Naruto scoffed. "Sasuke hates me, he wouldn't do anything if I was in that situation. Why the hell should I help him?"

Kakashi paused. Was this really how Naruto felt?

"...I think you're underestimating Sasuke."

Naruto gave him a questioning look. "Really? Because he's made it more than clear about his thoughts concerning me."

Kakashi shrugged. "You should know that people aren't as crystal-clear as they seem." The because you've definitely hidden things was very much implied.

"...I still don't see why I should help him."

"You genuinely like him. I know you do, don't deny it. That should be reason enough for the great Naruto Uzumaki."

Naruto was silent. Then he sighed. "Why're you always right?"

"I'm your sensei, that's my job."

Naruto stood up, stretching.

That's when Kakashi turned his eyes back to his other students.

Sakura had slammed a rock on Sasuke's head, and the boy was now on the ground, unconscious, lying in a pool of his own blood.

Sakura sighed happily. "There! That's so much better!"

Kakashi ended up rushing Sasuke to the hospital, and Naruto dragged Sakura along, keeping her from harming anyone else (he was surprisingly persuasive).

Luckily, Sasuke had only gotten a minor concussion and needed stitches, no permanent brain damage. Sakura had her hand stitched and wrapped.

Kakashi had a medic forcefully dispel the alcohol out of Sakura's system (he and Naruto winced at the sounds of her vomiting violently). She would have a killer hangover, but nothing more.

Kakashi couldn't even punish her for harming her teammate since he was the one who had gotten her drunk. Besides, she probably wouldn't even remember the whole thing the next day.

"Well," Naruto said, sitting next to an unconscious Sasuke, "that didn't go well."

"Yeah...it's not as bad as what happened to my sensei's team, though. He woke up naked in the woods, Sasuke's father was suffering from severe chakra exhaustion for reasons we've never figured out, and Lord Hiashi ended up with a dead body."

"...dead body?"

"Yeah. The woman ended up being a Kumo nuke-nin so Lord Hiashi didn't get into much trouble."

"I see...do you still have any sake on you?"

Kakashi looked Naruto over. "You're still drunk, aren't you?"

"Yep."

"I don't think I've ever heard a drunk person admit that they're drunk."

"There's a first time for everything."

"I know. Anyway, I think that was enough drinking for one day."

Naruto sighed. "Whatever, Kakashi-sensei."

* * *

Sasuke spent the night at the hospital. He woke up the next morning, good as new (albeit with a large hangover), with no memories past drinking his second cup of alcohol.

Sakura was sent home and Kakashi was thoroughly chewed out by her parents ("I DON'T CARE IF IT'S TRADITION, OUR DAUGHTER US TWELVE! AND WHY IS HER ARM WRAPPED?!"). She didn't remember anything past her first drink.

Naruto...Kakashi actually lost track of him. One minute he was there, and the next he was gone.

When they met again the next week, Naruto seemed fine. He seemed a little more contemplative than usual, and Kakashi would sometimes catch him staring at Sasuke with a calculating look in his eyes, but that was it.

And all was well.

* * *

Fifteen Years Later:

"Sensei," Sarada Uchiha said, "this is alcohol."

"I know," Konahamaru said cheerfully. "This is Team 7 tradition! Your first drink is with your teammates!"

"...we're not Team 7," Boruto pointed out.

Konahamaru pouted. "That might be so, but you're the ones who follow the legacy of the previous Team 7s."

"Well," Boruto said, "I'm always up for an adventure!" He proceeded to down a whole cup.

Mitsuki smiled and followed along.

Sarada hesitates slightly, but then copied her teammates. Konahamaru's smile widened.

"So," Mitsuki said, "the previous Team 7 did this? What happened to them?"

Boruto and Sarada looked interested.

Konahamaru laughed. "I asked Lord Sixth and he said that Sasuke got so drunk that he forgot most everything and Sakura gave Sasuke a concussion after claiming that the sound of him breathing was annoying."

There were many laughs.

When they called down, Boruto asked, "What about my old man?"

Konahamaru frowned slightly. "Nothing much happened with him. As you know, he has Kurama. He seemed to counteract a lot of the alcohol's negative effects."

"So my dad wasn't drunk?"

"No, he was drunk. He just didn't act any different than he did when he wasn't drunk...at least that's what Lord Sixth told me."

Boruto sighed despondently. "Well, there goes my plan for blackmail."

Konahamaru chuckled.

In the end, Sarada ended up with a pet rock named Zaza, Boruto was convinced he was a bird, and Mitsuki started laughing uncontrollably (and passing out because he couldn't seem to get air into his lungs).

Ah, good times.


End file.
